Funny smartass quotes about life - Check out our smartass quotes selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our digital prints shops.

 
funny witty quotes "Arguing with a fool proves there are two." - Doris M. Smith "Better a witty fool than a foolish wit." - William Shakespeare witty sarcastic quotes "Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs." - Oliver Goldsmith short witty quotes "Down to earth, but still above you." ― Unknown Witty Quotes about Self. Times recorder obit

Stop procrastinating because who knows what tomorrow brings. “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.” —Erma Bombeck. Procrastination can be bad for your health—and that includes your mental health. Humorist Erma Bombeck understood that well.Aug 25, 2021 - Explore Azez Krasner's board "Warrior quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about warrior quotes, quotes, badass quotes.27. You’re inspiring. If I suddenly lost my thumbs, IDK how I’d still be posting Instagram stories. They’re incapacitated when it comes to sending a simple text, yet they can Insta their ...Aug 15, 2021 - Explore Kasie C's board "Funny/Smartass Quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about smartass quotes, quotes, funny quotes.Feb 23, 2020 · 16. Being smart is always reading other people. “One of the smartest things you can do as a manager is to hire the right person and then keep them happy. Happy workers tend to take less time off ... 1. “When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.” 2. “I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life .”...Love Quotes 93.5k Life Quotes 74k Inspirational Quotes 70.5k Humor Quotes 42.5k Philosophy Quotes 28.5k Inspirational Quotes Quotes 25.5k God Quotes 25.5k Truth Quotes 23k Wisdom Quotes 22.5k Romance Quotes 21.5k Poetry Quotes 21kMGM. Below is our list of the top 20 Arnold Schwarzenegger movie quotes. If you disagree then perhaps you shouldn't "stick around" and we'll "consider that a divorce". “I’ll be back ...31. “Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”—. Oscar Wilde. 32. “ The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are ...Oct 13, 2019 - Sarcastic and sarcasm quotes. See more ideas about sarcasm quotes, sarcastic, quotes. You are such a light.” —Moshe Davis. “The darkness of the whole world cannot swallow the glowing of a candle.” —Robert Atlinger. “We light candles in testament that faith makes miracles possible.” —Nachum Braverman. “Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life.” —Buddha.Funny Witty Quotes. “Do your own thinking independently. Be the chess player, not the chess piece.” ~ Ralph Charell. “If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.” ~ Reese Witherspoon. “A person is wise if he listens to millions of advice and doesn’t implement any of it.” ~ Michael Bassey Johnson.First of all, don’t be afraid to call them out on their behavior. Smartasses thrive on getting a rise out of people, so let them know that their antics are not appreciated. Secondly, don’t be afraid to use humor as a weapon against them. Smartasses are usually trying to be funny themselves, so they’ll have a hard time dealing with someone ...Tags: smart ass, funny saying, funny sayings, lazy, funny quote, procrastinate, procrastinators, joke, funny, humor, procrastination, procrastinator, dilly dally ...2. “I’m not rude I just have the balls to say what everyone else is thinking.”. 3. “The most dangerous phrase in any language is “We’ve always done it this way.”. 4. “I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.”. 5. “Why be moody when you can shake yo booty”. 6.Funny Smart Quotes About Life Life is too short to be taken seriously, and sometimes a dash of humor is just what we need to lighten the mood and gain a fresh perspective on the complexities of existence. Here are a few quotes that best fit this situation: "Life is a canvas, and we are the artists. Paint it with colors that make your soul dance."Sometimes I'm asleep.” ― Jim Butcher, Blood Rites tags: humor , impudence , sarcasm , smartass 2092 likes Like “All my friends seem to be smart arses. Don't ask me why. Like …Born with a smirk smartass for life if you are going to be a smart ass you at least have to be smart first. Top 80 sarcastic quotes 1. Sarcasm is the brain defence mechanism against stupid people. See more ideas about quotes funny quotes smartass quotes. The lowest of the low. Don t let someone else dictate how you live your life. Awesome short ...Oct 20, 2023 · 01 “I bet it took you a whole year to come up with that one.”. This is something you can use when the smartass says something really funny. It says that you know he/she isn’t good at this, so it must’ve taken some time to come up with the line. 02 “The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.”. Oct 20, 2023 · 01 “I bet it took you a whole year to come up with that one.”. This is something you can use when the smartass says something really funny. It says that you know he/she isn’t good at this, so it must’ve taken some time to come up with the line. 02 “The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.”. Humor Quotes. “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”. “So many books, so little time.”. “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”.Mar 20, 2023 - Explore marie vandiver's board "smartass quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about quotes, funny quotes, smartass quotes.Find and save ideas about smartass quotes on Pinterest. "Everything in life has the potential to be funny. Stop hating on smartasses. Smartasses seize the moment while you are too busy over there being uptight. Born with a smirk, smartass for life." "If you are going to be a smart ass, you at least have to be smart first. Otherwise you are simply just an ass."Asshole Dad And Smartass Daughter Best Friends For Life. Tags: asshole dad, ... Responsible Quote Shirt,Sarcastic Tee,Smartass Shirt,Funny Sarcasm Shirt, perfect gift ...10. "Me thinking about my life." 11. "When you're an adult but you feel like a kid faking their way through life." 12. "When everything is going wrong in your life but you're used to it." 13. "Me ...There will also be times when you’ll find inspiration in the most sarcastic lines and have them saved on your phone. Sometimes it takes a while to come up with wisecracks, so to give you a little boost of creativity to unleash your sardonic wit, here are some truly sarcastic quotes that are equal parts wise and hilarious. Sarcastic Quotes. 1.Some examples of a yearbook dedication include writing an inspiring quote, writing something supportive, sharing a personal funny moment or writing an inside joke. Write the message that shares a personal congratulations and includes a few ...That is correct. You’ve stumbled upon a place that lists over 100 funny, witty, creative, and surprising ways to say “yes.”. The rest is up to you! Give me a "Y." Give me an "E." Give me an "S." Combine those …There are always two opinions: Mine and the wrong one. (Unknown) A word of kindness is seldom spoken in vain, while witty sayings are as easily lost as the pearls slipping from a broken string. (George Dennison Prentice) Life has no legs, but it can certainly give you a kick in the butt.28. "The easiest way to organize your stuff is to get rid of most of it.". 29. "When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they're not it." —Bernard Bailey. 30. "Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep." —Carl Sandburg. 31.There are always two opinions: Mine and the wrong one. (Unknown) A word of kindness is seldom spoken in vain, while witty sayings are as easily lost as the pearls slipping from a broken string. (George Dennison Prentice) Life has no legs, but it can certainly give you a kick in the butt.If you’re looking for funny quotes to make you smile, to give a toast with, or to send to a loved one, you’ve come to the right place. We’ve curated the best funny quotes and sayings that cover everything from everyday life to relationships and even work!01 "I bet it took you a whole year to come up with that one.". This is something you can use when the smartass says something really funny. It says that you know he/she isn't good at this, so it must've taken some time to come up with the line. 02 "The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.".7. "I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life." 8. "Life is like looking for your phone, most of the time it's in your hand." 9. "To be old and wise you must first be young and ...A life insurance quote is, at its most basic, an estimate from an insurer outlining the anticipated amount of money you’ll pay to secure the life insurance coverage you want. Functionally, life insurance is a financial safety net for the be...Lots of famous quotes, witty sayings, humorous observations and the meaning of life… just kidding. Pickup Lines. We have lots of witty one-liners and snappy comebacks, all with the goal of engaging the opposite sex. Some of these pickup lines are guaranteed to have never worked. Art from the Big Easy.Jun 2, 2020 - Explore Heather Elie-Gray's board "Smartass quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny quotes, quotes, smartass quotes.Love, Funny, Life. save quote picture. Motivational Quote of the Day. You have not failed until you quit trying. Gordon B. Hinckley. Inspirational, Spiritual, Trying. ... Funny Quote of the Day. If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat! Demetri Martin. Funny, Witty, Humorous. save quote picture.14-jan-2023 - Bekijk het bord "Bullet quotes" van Nele Claes op Pinterest. Bekijk meer ideeën over citaten, teksten, inspirerende citaten.One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”. “It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”. “Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.”. “Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.”. Smart Quotes. Quotes tagged as "smart" Showing 1-30 of 581. "Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery.". ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. tags: acceptance , inspiration , inspirational , smart , understanding , wise. 4130 likes.Inspiring Short Quotes. “Impossible is for the unwilling.” ~ John Keats. “No pressure, no diamonds.” ~ Thomas Carlyle. “Dream big and dare to fail.” ~ Norman Vaughan. “Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure.” ~ Jim Rohn. “We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone.” ~ Ronald Reagan.One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.". "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.". "Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.". "Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.".Lawrence Welk. Good Day, Bad Day, Parental. 20 Copy quote. Show source. Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.Funny Clever Jokes That Make You Sound Smart. There are a lot of ways to make people laugh through a handful of words. But when it comes to a sophisticated audience, an average «pop» joke is not enough. To sound smart and witty, get inspired with these funny clever jokes: Why was 500AD to 900AD known as the Dark Ages?Love, Funny, Life. save quote picture. Motivational Quote of the Day. You have not failed until you quit trying. Gordon B. Hinckley. Inspirational, Spiritual, Trying. ... Funny Quote of the Day. If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat! Demetri Martin. Funny, Witty, Humorous. save quote picture.Sep 22, 2018 - Explore Lisa Cyphers's board "Smartass Quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about smartass quotes, quotes, funny quotes. Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. Spanish proverb. When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. Rodney Dangerfield. Rice is great when you’re hungry and you want 2000 of something. Mitch Hedberg. Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. Unknown.This List of quotes and sayings commonly used in everyday conversational English, can help to speak English like a native speaker by learning English idiomatic expressions and proverbs. Funny One Liners. When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start looking like nails. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.Like. “A stupid person can make only certain, limited types of errors; the mistakes open to a clever fellow are far broader. But to the one who knows how smart he is compared to everyone else, the possibilities for true idiocy are boundless.”. ― Steven Brust, Iorich. tags: humor , smartass , smartness , stupid. 53 likes. Enjoy reading and share 100 famous quotes about Smartass with everyone ... Master of Stupidity: If I tell you, there is nobody left to be made fun of. — Toba Beta. Smartass Disciple: Master, that guy's teaching is somehow ... Well, I forget. Shit happened, life goes on. — Toba Beta. Smartass Disciple: Master, can you trust this bank to keep ...When the world is getting you down, using sarcastic memes can help you laugh your way through life. And these sayings will help you get by with the best …10. Roses are red, violets are blue, your dong is massive, I want to blow you. 11. Roses are red, the sun is shining, but my mental health is rapidly declining. 12. Roses are red, violets are blue, I love you, let’s go screw. 13. Roses are red, violets are blue, it’s gonna take dental records to identify you. 14.10. Roses are red, violets are blue, your dong is massive, I want to blow you. 11. Roses are red, the sun is shining, but my mental health is rapidly declining. 12. Roses are red, violets are blue, I love you, let’s go screw. 13. Roses are red, violets are blue, it’s gonna take dental records to identify you. 14.The dumber you are, the smarter you think you are. Click The Pin For More Funny Quotes. Share the Cheer - Please Re-Pin. #funny #funnyquotes #quotes #quotestoliveby #dailyquote #wittyquotes #oneliner #joke Rose Nylund, The Golden Girls. “My mother used to say: the older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”. Woman's Day. 5.33. “Have some fun with your life. Call in sick to places you don’t even work at.” – Anonymous. 34. “Life is hard. After all, it kills you.” – Katharine Hepburn. Sarcastic Quotes on People and Their Characteristics. 35. “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.” – Steven WrightTop 80 sarcastic quotes 1. Whether you re looking to tell it like it is or offer someone a confusing truth about human behavior these 11 quotes to live by are sure to help you out. See more ideas about quotes smartass quotes funny quotes. Sep 22 2018 explore lisa cyphers s board smartass quotes on pinterest. Life is about creating yourself.”. “Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value.”. “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.”. “You define your own life. Don't let other people write your script.”. “Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day-in and day-out.”.Check out our smartass quotes selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our digital prints shops.5. “Life is short, and every moment is precious.”—. Gad Saad. Don’t forget to read these positive affirmations that help bring you joy and success in life. 6. “You may delay, but time ...Short Witty Captions and Quotes. “One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.”. “Never miss a good chance to shut up.”. – Will Rogers. “It takes a long time to grow an old friend.”. – John Leonard. “It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.”. – Tom Robbins. “Never try to have the last word.Rose Nylund, The Golden Girls. “My mother used to say: the older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”. Woman's Day. 5.Charles Shulz. "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.". - George Carlin. A day without laughter is a day wasted. Charlie Chaplin. Political correctness is tyranny with manners. Charleton Heston. If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. Dalai Lama.All my friends seem to be. 15 funny smartass quotes about life best life quotes in hd. Being single 30 happy inspiring quotes for singles smartass quotes to live by. Often the best clever quotes are actually making fun of the person saying them which shows that some very clever people enjoy making fun of themselves instead of others. Not a ...I'm Not Responsible For What My Face Does When You Talk T-Shirt, Responsible Quote Shirt,Sarcastic Tee,Smartass Shirt,Funny Sarcasm Shirt. Sale Price $9.91. Original Price $14.16 (30% off) Add to Favorites. Don't be a smartass that job is taken svg shirt design for the smartass in your life.May 9, 2019 - Explore Krystal Keyser's board "Funny & Smart Ass Memes", followed by 578 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny, smart ass, memes.Often the best clever quotes are actually making fun of the person saying them, which shows that some very clever people enjoy making fun of themselves, instead of others. Humor is a great way to soften the blow of becoming aware of one's faults and shortcomings, and so helps us to forgive ourselves for not being perfect.First of all, don’t be afraid to call them out on their behavior. Smartasses thrive on getting a rise out of people, so let them know that their antics are not appreciated. Secondly, don’t be afraid to use humor as a weapon against them. Smartasses are usually trying to be funny themselves, so they’ll have a hard time dealing with someone ... Stop procrastinating because who knows what tomorrow brings. "Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart." —Erma Bombeck. Procrastination can be bad for your health—and that includes your mental health. Humorist Erma Bombeck understood that well.Humor Quotes. “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”. “So many books, so little time.”. “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”.7. “If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.”. — Billy Wilder. 8. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.”. — Charles M. Schulz. 9. “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”.Smart Quotes. Quotes tagged as "smart" Showing 1-30 of 581. “Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery.”. ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. tags: acceptance , inspiration , inspirational , smart , understanding , wise. 4131 likes. Like.Smart Quotes. Quotes tagged as "smart" Showing 1-30 of 581. “Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery.”. ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. tags: acceptance , inspiration , inspirational , smart , understanding , wise. 4131 likes. Like.You are such a light.” —Moshe Davis. “The darkness of the whole world cannot swallow the glowing of a candle.” —Robert Atlinger. “We light candles in testament that faith makes miracles possible.” —Nachum Braverman. “Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life.” —Buddha.Sep 19, 2023 - These sassy sarcastic quotes fuel our day, every day. It's like the vision board that personifies us. We're sassy, sarcastic, quirky, snarky, and smartass-y! Top Smartass Quotes. Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. ~ Oscar Wilde. Better to play dumb than to go as smartass… after all smartasses get what they deserve in the end. ~ Deyth Banger. The trick is to find that one person who can give it back as good as they can take it. ~ Sally Thorne.Sep 19, 2023 - These sassy sarcastic quotes fuel our day, every day. It's like the vision board that personifies us. We're sassy, sarcastic, quirky, snarky, and smartass-y! Clever Quotes. There’s nothing like a really clever joke or one-liner to make us laugh, and that’s why we the team at Quotereel really enjoyed collecting these clever quotes. Most of them are funny, some of them are thoughtful, and some are thought-provoking. Clever humor is often based on sarcasm, which is a way of saying something ...Quotes tagged as "funny" Showing 1-30 of 9,860. “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America ...Charles Shulz. “May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.”. – George Carlin. A day without laughter is a day wasted. Charlie Chaplin. Political correctness is tyranny with manners. Charleton Heston. If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. Dalai Lama.Feb 10, 2022 · Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. – Marlo Thomas. I haven’t failed at anything, I’ve just found all the wrong ways of doing it.

Laughs, Serious Quotes, Jokes. 249,268 likes · 158,588 talking about this. JOKES LAUGHS AND QUOTES....KEEP SMILING... PLEASE SHARE WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND BRING A SMILE TO THEIR. Travel cna jobs near me

funny smartass quotes about life

One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.". "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.". "Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.". "Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.".13. "If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". - Anonymous. 14. "If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don't want to give off the wrong impression.". - Anonymous. 15. "My level of sarcasm has gotten to a point where I don't even know if I am kidding anymore.".Aug 3, 2023 · The sappy and sentimental quotes aren’t for everyone, and that’s okay. Some people like to live by humorous lines and end up inspiring others with their witty quips. A good amount of comedy reminds people that no matter how tough life gets, a few laughs can make things seem a little better. Jun 8, 2020 - Explore Nubian Goddess's board "Mischievous humor" on Pinterest. See more ideas about life quotes, inspirational quotes, badass quotes.Jun 27, 2022 - IFunny is fun of your life. Images, GIFs and videos featured seven times a day. Your anaconda definitely wants some. Fun fact: we deliver faster than Amazon. ... Vintage Funny Quotes. Sarcastic Quotes Funny. Vintage Humor. Snarky. Funny Memes. Hilarious. Jokes. Sarcastic Smile. Smartass Quotes. T. iFunny. 792k followers. …Dec 19, 2019 - Explore Allan Cochnauer Jr.'s board "smartass quotes", followed by 120 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about quotes, funny quotes, smartass quotes.Friends are treasures for life. Keep them safe. Gossips and mistrust can separate good friends. A friend can teach you the best lessons in life. You can share your joys and deepest sorrows with a good friend. A friend who understands your moments of silence is the closest to you. Cherish and treasure them for life.7. "I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life." 8. "Life is like looking for your phone, most of the time it's in your hand." 9. "To be old and wise you must first be young and ...Sep 20, 2021 · “Everything in life has the potential to be funny. Stop hating on smartasses. Smartasses seize the moment while you are too busy over there being uptight. Born with a smirk, smartass for life.” “If you are going to be a smart ass, you at least have to be smart first. Otherwise you are simply just an ass.” The funniest and most ridiculous quotes from literature, from Hardy's "Let us toss as men do" to Agatha Christie's "four-starred Pussy." Laugh-out-loud quotes from books Application error: a ...Rose Nylund, The Golden Girls. “My mother used to say: the older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”. Woman's Day. 5.I don't care vinyl decal, funny car sayings, funny window sitcker, leave me alone decal, funny vehicle quotes, smartass humor, cocky sticker (4.5k) $ 6.99.

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